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The Simple Guide to Understanding Shame in Children

The Simple Guide to Understanding Shame in Children

What It Is, What Helps and How to Prevent Further Stress or Trauma

Betsy de Thierry. Foreword by Dr Marc Bush, illustrated by Emma Reeves

Quick Overview

Full of helpful information and advice, this is the perfect introduction for any adult caring for or working with a child who has experienced shame. It explains what shame is, how it affects children and what adults can do to help them overcome it.
Details Price Qty
Paperback / softback
2018, 7.72in x 5.04in / 196mm x 128mm, 112pp
ISBN: 9781785925054
2018, ePUB, 80pp
ISBN: 978-1-78450-895-1
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· What is shame?
· How does it affect children?
· How can adults help?

The perfect starting point for any adult or carer working with children who have experienced shame, this guide provides straightforward answers and explanations to both common and complex questions.

At a time when children are more likely than ever to experience shame, the accessible advice in this book helps adults to boost children's self-esteem. Betsy de Thierry navigates the need to understand its impact and the reasons behind it, as well as how to reduce its hold on self-confidence. Reassuring advice will also help revitalize adults' abilities to face the challenges of supporting children affected by shame. It will teach them how to restore self-esteem.


'Another brilliant book by Betsy de Thierry. Shame is such a crucial area and emotion, however one that is often overlooked. Therefore it is great to see a book that offers a deeper understanding and practical ideas for support around shame. This book is written in an accessible, engaging, and informative way. The doodles and reflective questions are fantastic too. A welcome addition to any book shelf!'
- Karen Treisman


Thorough, underpinned by extensive researched and well articulated.

de Thierry manages to write a short guide about shame, a challenging task but one very well executed. If you're looking to understand shame, how it seeps into our being from a very young age and how 'toxic shame can be like a poison in our subconscious', then this guide is for you. For parents, educators, therapists and social workers, this guide is an essential starting point pulling together all the latest knowledge, research and experience.

- Lisa Cherry, BA (Hons) Sociology, ITEC Dip HM, S.A.C. Dip., Life Coaching and Counselling, Reiki Master

'The Simple Guide to Understanding Shame in Children by Betsy de Thierry is thoughtful insight into how shame has such a pervading hold on us all, sometimes with disastrous consequences. De Thierry argues that feelings of shame are often at the root of unhelpful behaviours and linked to a primeval fear we may be abandoned or rejected by our tribe or society. Unwittingly, though, it remains a thread that runs through traditional parenting and the education system, driving the sensitive child towards shame rather than away from it and cutting off crucial relationships with others. The Simple Guide to Understanding Shame in Children by Betsy de Thierry is an important read for adoptive parents and those working with children who may already be sensitive to shame due to damaging life experiences. This book provides a key to understanding the sometimes bewildering and distressing behaviours by those locked in the grip of shame.'
- Jill Turner, Editor, Adoption Today


By (author): Betsy de Thierry
Illustrated by: Emma Reeves